All Your Life

#allyourlife

All your life

you have this feeling

that you are supposed to be 

be something bigger than what

and who you already are

Something major

something tangibly bright and beautiful

with enough of the right kind of rust

and ancient around your edges

to classify you as credible and timeless

by those that matter

When art moves through you

it is relentless;

you make such little sense

to the outside world

I’ve been wanting to paint lately

and I couldn’t tell you why

or recall

when the desire

came over me

but for once

I don’t care

for calculations

or re-numerations -

I do not have

nostalgic anticipation

for the humming bird workings

of my detached cerebral mass -

tootoo much

of what I’ve relied on

rests upon my neurological circuitry

I am

disconnected from the moon  

left in motion

I replay and re-preach

in ancestral disbelief

liquid seeds pocketed

underneath my sacral chakra

I am

re-awakening 

I wish it were this easy

to walk

upon creative waters

to stop

and say nothing else really matters

but my desire

and this moment

and this fire

inside my heart

that has been wanting to

keep me warm

for so long

for so long

 for too long.