If no one has ever told you, I will say this to you now.
YOU are worthy and YOU are inherently good.
You ARE worthy AND you
are inherently good.
You are WORTHY and you are INHERENTLY good.
Imagine that.
Imagine this, now,
because it is true.
You don't need to prove
this to anyone, or seek anyone's approval of your "inner-goodness."
There is nothing wrong with you. You are not defected in any way, shape or
form. There is nothing wrong with your body, your hair or your true heartfelt
desires. You don't need to find ways to "be useful" as a means
to justify being loved, as means of saying, without saying
it, "I deserve to be loved because I am useful." Because
nothing! You deserve to be loved by yourself, and by those who respect and
honor your personal boundaries. Period. Because nothing! Do you feel
me?
Of course, it's always
nice to help others out. But, let’s take these five minutes to look closer.
All of this seeking to be
of use, all of this seeking to be of service, can sometimes hide a weed
underneath that needs to be uprooted and thrown away. It can sometimes mask
this belief that if you don't provide
this or that for others, then you are not useful, and therefore, do not deserve
to be loved. I am merely asking you to examine this possibility. I also want to
note, that this dynamic - the false belief that you must do ______ or exchange
________ in order to be loved - is not always the motivating factor behind
seeking to be of use. You can give from a pure heart because you want to give,
because you are full of love, because you were raised to contribute to the well-being
of those around you, and it has become a feel-good habit for you and not because you are trying to prove anything at all.
Though, you can give from
a pure-heart, and give because you are full of love, and give because it's how
your family raised you or it's how you decided you wanted to be as an adult (a
person of service). These are all beautiful realities and roles to occupy. You
could give for all these reasons, and you could still also hold a subconscious or
even an unconscious belief (buried way down there, underneath your subconscious
so much so that you are not even aware of this belief) that you are not lovable
unless you do these acts of service for others. It is layered. Our minds can be
a twenty-two foot story building, with each level housing a particular belief,
branded by a certain childhood experience we integrated long ago as meaningful
to us in some way. We may have then cleverly transformed this experience into a value, or, “right”
and “commendable” perspective on what it means to be moral, to be upstanding,
to be worthy and deserving.
My main encouragement
today is, take the time to examine the roots of your branches - why do you do
what you do? And although your external behavior, mission and actions may be
digested as socially acceptable, perhaps even courageous, "all the
rage," and praised, consider if you are doing what you are doing because
you want to prove to yourself that you are "a good person" and a
"wholesome moral person” and thus, worthy of love.
Or, do you do what you do
because you know, without a doubt that you are inherently lovable, deserving of
love, and inherently good? Please know that you don't need to do anything to be liked. Please
know that you don't need to
do anything to be worthy of love. You are lovable,
period.
Can you accept this truth
without unpacking it, over-analyzing it and finding situations where this truth
is "untrue" and therefore rendered invalid in the recesses of your
mind and heart? Can you accept that power -- all of that beauty? It can
feel overwhelming, to accept the fact that you are inherently good. But try to push yourself to take this in - that
there is absolutely nothing wrong with you in any way, shape or form; that you
are here to embody love simply because you are love, and not because you
need to justify your ability to be loved by anyone.
Always,
S.S.
